Kevin Standlee (kevin_standlee) wrote,
Kevin Standlee

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Inquiry Into the Armadillo Affair

The Board of Inquiry into the Armadillo Affair convened in Hilton Room 2113 at 22:30 last night. President of the Board was Col. Ed Green of the Space Cadets (personal representative of Commandant Christian McGuire). The Board consisted of Commodore Vincent Docherty of the White Star Federated Spacelines, Peggy Rae Sapienza (due to her extensive experience with space pirates), Capt. Tom Veal of the TASFiC II, and Capt. David W. Clark of the St. Francis. Presenting the case against me was Col. David Gallaher (described here as "WSFS’s shadowy, mustachioed Head of Security") and Capt. Tom Whitmore (who had shared command of the Quetzlcoatl with me in 2002). My defense was presented by Don Timm.

It was looking pretty dire for me throughout the entire inquiry, at witness after witness testified to my responsibility for the ship's loss. In my defense, it was pointed out that the ship's security budget had been gutted in order to fund the Real Ale Bar. Nevertheless, the Board looked ready to find against me, although they did poll the audience for their opinions, circulating two boxes (one for guilty, one for acquittal) and encouraging money donations in each. (The total proceeds are to be donated to the Red Cross for Hurricane Katrina relief.)

Rope was being prepared for a noose when Mr. Timm called Seth Breidbart as a surprise witness, who under examination confessed to having disguised himself as me (Ghod knows how) and let the Space Pirates aboard. Although Seth did point out that this still left me responsible, the Board (and the large crowd present) decided to acquit me and with loud cries of "Kill Seth! Kill Seth!" the inquiry was closed and my good name restored.

Many thanks to all those who participated, to SFSFC for funding the reception, and to CascadiaCon for the donation of their Green Room for the venue.

Update, 11:45 AM: According to issue 6B of the con newsletter, Fax Cascadia (they needed an extra because there was more news than would fit a single issue), the participants in the gathering donated $100, which Col. Gallaher will forward to the American Red Cross. There were no indications of how much was donated toward "acquit" and "convict," which is probably just as well.
Tags: cascadiacon, nasfic

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